Good God

[TacklinFuel]

As I was driving to my last home visit trying to calm down I was cheered up immensely. I thought I had caught some Pantera which would make me lose my anger but it was the last ten seconds. The I got some Fleetwood Mac and they always make me much much happier since most of them were really unhappy when they wrote their little songs. As I was sitting there in my car seatdancing I looked over and what do I see.

Behold, you can never cage wild animals. I see a man or woman, I couldn't tell at first, staring at me as if she never saw a fat honkey seatdancing before. I look back and smile, because that is the nice thing to do when you are truly staring at the person staring at you. The smile hid the fact that I was trying to figure out whether it was a man or woman.

Then I realized. It was a woman.

I was thrown off by the general lack of boobage.

I was thrown off by the general lack of boobage because the woman was not wearing a bra.

I was thrown off by the general lack of boobage because the lack of a bra meant that this older black woman's boobs were resting on her lap as she drove.

And, I have to admit, I haven't been that turned on by an older black woman since I first had the tingles down there when I was 7 and seeing Weezie Jefferson for the first time as a woman. Mmm mmm good.

But then I was concerned and here is why I was concerned. Because those gigantic fun bags were above the lap belt and free to roam about the cabin of the car. I envisioned a potential fender bender that turned deadly as those mammoth mammaries (who may have descended from Myanmar) started shooting all over the car.

I saw the passanger decapitated within seconds as the right one went in it's natural direction while the driver was severely injured when the left broke through the drivers side window and struck down the poor passerby who had the misfortune of walking by this car at the most inopportune time.

Death by left breast. An ignoble way to go.

I also saw them crazy knockers swinging all over the place in that car like a superball dropped on the highway from an overpass.